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April 24, 2008

Harmful Addictive Masturbation

-Patrick S Lasswell

About the closest I ever came to killing anybody during my military service was during a locker inspection when an officer purposefully degraded my personal gear under the auspices of “health and comfort.” Normally your locker was your own, but every once in a while some idiot would bring drugs back to the ship and the “health and comfort” inspection would follow. As a rule court martials would throw out evidence gathered at these extremely suspect evolutions, but it did serve the purpose of keeping stupid sailors honest and hiding their weed in the ventilation ducting.

I have never done drugs and the officer in question was not looking for contraband. He was deliberately demeaning me because he had the opportunity to do so. He was a sawed off little twerp who was forgetting about the responsibility to lead and was engaging in some kind of petty mind game. It filtered back to him through diverse ways that his conduct was beyond the pale and would not be accepted in the future. I stood by and let him mockingly go through every item of my personal possession without incident. My shipmates stood by me to the extent they could, equally shocked that this officer would so forget himself to take the attitude he did. Eighteen years later it still raises my blood pressure.

Amongst the worst things this commissioned short man's syndrome did was comment at length about my collection of men's magazines and examine them page by page. Now Congressmen Broun of Georgia wants to do the same kind of thing for the entire military by labeling us perverts for purchasing Playboy at the exchange.

When I raised my hand to join the military I openly swore to obedience, even from from malicious shrimps appointed over me. I accepted a fairly substantial amount of poverty as part of my service; the pay rates were pretty clearly written. But I never swore to chastity, and it seems beyond the pale for this Congressman to ask it of me in word, thought, and men's magazine. Congressman Broun's aides describe him as an “addictionologist” and qualified to pass judgment on the sexuality of the entire US military. Has anybody ever checked the good doctor for obsessional intrusiveness?

Part of military service is forgoing a substantial amount of sexual activity. We are often isolated geographically from people with whom we can form healthy relationships. Even when we are at home, the requirements of the service often occupy us in eighteen-hour days and seven day weeks for months on end. For junior service members it is difficult to attract a wife with the explanation that as a couple you will probably have to go on food stamps when a child comes along. It is difficult to imagine one thing we need less than an “addictionologist” putting one more barrier to clean, safe, and lonely sexual release.

If the good doctor is so worried about harmful addictive masturbation, why doesn't he focus his attention on earmarks?

Comments

Nice rant, Patrick. :)

Why do you need porn to masturbate? Why punish the children and wives of soldiers by having porn on post? If a guy in the combat zone can't control himself, why does he need porn (he ought to be ready for lift off without it) and why should he have materials that could cause a scandal in the host country?

No one is talking about taking away a soldier's "right" to porn. America is full of it. But it should NOT be on military posts. PERIOD.

Amy,

"No one is talking about taking away a soldier's "right" to porn. America is full of it. But it should NOT be on military posts. PERIOD."

Either it should not be on military property or it should not be confiscated, you can't have it both ways.

Nobody is punishing the wives and children with the pornography. It is hidden away behind the counter where it cannot be readily seen by young children and can be readily ignored by wifes.

Why do the troops need your involvement in their sex lives?

FWIW, my take:

If you're willing to put YOUR LIFE on the line for me (just an average American, who never served), YOU DESERVE THE BEST!

If Playboy, or any other mag or video, floats your boat - you should get it.

And, you should get it FREE of CHARGE. Call it an "In Kind Contribution" from America to you.

Thank you, to all servicemen and women, for keeping me and mine safe!!!

Taking away porn will create problems that manifest themselves in other ways like discipline and so on. Stop treating service people like children, they can look at anything they want as long as they do their job. The wives do not need to approve understandably, but they need to understand.

I support your point of view with one exception. You ridicule the officer, in part, for simply being short! I don't see how his height had anything to do with his unprofessional behavior. And as a short person myself, I am offended by your remark. Please stick to criticizing people's characteristics that actually deserve criticism.

Mr. Lasswell,
It's even worse nowadays. When we get deployed to the Mid-East, we are forbidden under threat of Article 15/Captain's Mast from having any "good" magazines there. So imagine being deployed to Iraq for a year and not getting to see a Playboy.

Additionally, I read yesterday that doctors have discovered that males who ejaculate at least five times a week have 33% less chance of getting prostate cancer. http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,352276,00.html

Now Amy: stop being offended by magazines which are properly hidden from minors. What if all the males in the military had the same stupid reaction to the highly over-sexed Cosmo magazine (and the possibly worse Teen Cosmo for crying outloud) and got it banned from base?
And, if you've got a boyfriend or husband in the military, wouldn't you rather he "use" Playboy to fulfill his needs while deployed, rather than find a lady willing to fulfill his needs for him?

Ron Kendal,

I am sorry you feel that way and for the insult you percieve.

It is just that based on my reflections from eighteen years of gained experience, that is the only explanation I have for his behavior. He forgot to be an officer. I had never disrespected him and I had never sought confrontation with him. I gave him the respect due his rank and willingness to assume responsibility. He went looking for a fight he could not lose and was cruel and sick.

I have served with short people since without problem and I work diligently to support diversity in the military. I am not criticizing this individual for elements of his existence beyond his control. I am criticizing him for losing control.

I was in the navy myself, on a sub. I can't imagine a worse fate then being trapped underwater for three months with all men and no porn.

Amy Proctor -- as usual in almost everything you do, you are blindly stupid.

Sometimes you're right for "cultural conservative" reasons, by default... but your reasoning, morality, and often even selective choice of facts is so suspect, I disdain you now as always. You're an absolutish shill and I am so grateful I am not your husband.

I'd secretly look at porn before walking in the bedroom to do my duty "just because" you're such a cow.

Great post.

How much porn could a guy fit on a thumb drive?

How about on a 1 TB external hard drive?

How many of each could fit in a ruck? In 140,000 rucks?

Sorry, didn't really want this to be a math quiz...

Hopefully Mr Broun won't find us hiding here in the 21st century any time soon.

Not going to be very fair to take away all porn, yet allow married military couples to engage in sex in Iraq/Afghanistan. FloridaBill has it right and there are many companies who WILL send free magazines to those in combat zones. God bless them!!

Amazing. Some people here worried about what warriors are looking at or watching? They don't know if they'll see the next sunrise or survive to watch the next sunset serving a cause greater than themselves.

They don't know if the next time they board a helicopter or an armoured vehicle if they'll end up looking like hamburger meat and people actually begrudge them sexual excitement and a fleeting release from the terrors they experience 24/7?

Fortunately, from those that would censor their freedoms, they fight and die to preserve those selfsame freedoms some use to trivialize their courage and dedication.

George Orwell said -"People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf."

All those sky pilots who presume to foist their sexual predilictions on those fighting for their right to be ungrateful hypocrites - sleep peaceably, warm and safe tonight.


Yay, I was banned from Amy Proctor's place! I saw that one coming.

harry flashman, brilliant, brilliant post, well worded.

The last two post's attributations are juxtaposed. Harry Flashman's post begins "Amazing."
Sgt. Ron's begins "Yay,".

Stuff happens.

Sorry - new to this blog and it was I that screwed up - I that didn't see how the comments were attributed.

My apologies to our host.

Our Host: No problem.

I threw some rope every day of my Iraq deployment and am none the worse for it. When I was in BUD/S, we used to turn on a porn video as soon as the instructors came in for room inspections. Invariably they would all gather around the TV for a few minutes and completely forget to inspect our room ensuring a passing grade. That's what happens when men treat you like men, not moralizing douchebags treating the military like children.

There are men who are actually FAITHFUL and know when to use their sexuality and when to control it. No, I wouldn't rather my husband use Playboy when in Iraq. Id' rather he use nothing and let me use him when he gets home. That's how we do it.

The one theme totally absent here is how you "men" think this affects women. It's all about you and your penises. I wonder if your daughters were the ones posing nude if you'd care?

Amy,

Yes and for the single men...?

I did not get married when I was on active duty. The women I met were users and worse. The nice women were not around, not available, or not interested. I got out so I could have a married life.

For the overwhelming majority of service personnel, there is nobody for them when they come back from deployment to be faithful to.

There is a singular lack of consideration in your posts for the overwhelming majority of initial service junior personnel. You have lost touch with the people who need your understanding most. People who have comfortable, stable relationships don't need Playboy. The lonely service personnel do.

The wives get acres of exchange space for china, furniture, and other junk that the single service personnel never get to use. Give us a few square feet of sheltered exchange space for what they need.

I told Christoph to show some class. Amy, show some forbearance, forgiveness, and other Christian attributes.

This article is BS from the start. Officers do not search enlisted quarters. The Masters at Arms is a Chief PO or a 1st Class petty Officer.

JamesB,

I guess you haven't heard of a shipwide sweep? Or perhaps you never served on a Reserve Frigate? Or perhaps you did not serve in the Tin Can Navy? Or you just weren't there and are talking from a position of profound ignorance.

Mz. Proctor - One hardly knows where to start.

I've known military wives like you - bustin' your husband's balls from 10,000 miles away - as if he didn't have enough to do just staying alive so he could come home to hear your whining insecurities about airbrushed women in a magazine.

Your primary concern is whether he's lopin' his mule during a break in the action during a screaming sandstorm?

Bob Hope used to bring the great American beauties of his day over to combat areas - the man didn't spend a Christmas at home for 26 years. I remember when Raquel Welch stepped onto the stage at Chu Lai in '68 in her blue and white knit mini-dress and reminded every Marine lucky enough to be there of just one of the things we were fighting for.

We're not talking about just "men", Ms. Proctor - we're talking about the biggest minority in the USA - we're talking about warriors, a rare breed of "penises" that are willing to lose the use of same, permanently, to afford YOU the privelege of sniveling and moaning about feminine insecurities.

It is woman like you that jolt me into the recognition of how lucky I am not be anywhere near women like you.

In celebration of same, I'm going to wake up my oh-so-feminine, eager and loving Canadian girl (15 years my junior) and celebrate her unabridged womanhood in the manner of a warrior claiming the joy granted him by staying alive long enough to discern the difference between shrill self-centered, selfish fishwives and a real, appreciative, flesh and blood, hot, sweet, steamy and creamy woman.

The scary thing is you don't have a clue that it's absolutely not about our penises - it's really about all about your vagina.

It's about woman as goddess.

"Tin Can Navy." Lol. Haven't heard that term since my father passed. DD's and DDE's?

"They Were Expendable."

"It's about woman as goddess" = utter malarky

It's about purity versus pornography.

It's about G*d pleasing versus man pleasing.

"All things are lawful, but not all things are profitable. All things are lawful, but not all things edify." - 1 Cor. 10:23

An addiction to porn edifies no one. I don't believe anyone here has suggested that brave warriors abstain from masturbation (wouldn't want any risking prostate cancer ;-) ) Bringing images of women into that activity is a different subject.

flashman, it certainly SHOULD be about your wife's vagina that's where "forsaking all others" comes in real handy...ah, so to speak.

A man's purity doesn't have to be about any woman's insecurity either. Jesus spent time here as a bachelor-and if any of you guys want to try telling Him how righteous pornography is--*chuckle* nevermind, I don't believe in luck anyway.

I agree with you Patrick. The government needs to stay way out of what a sailor/soldier reads or involves himself in. As long as he can do the job and do it right. Stay the hell out of the liberties that the military men and women are fighting for. If they can't have them then why the hell should they protect them. (obviously most would still protect them anyway but you get the idea)

Laura,

"Bringing images of women into that activity is a different subject."

But...nobody likes serving with the guys who bring the images of goats and sheep (sometimes together!) into the activity.

Well - sated as I am at the moment, with a goddess, I'll try not to burn this thread down.

Jesus was a bachelor? You know? Anyone knows?

The God-made-man came here to live and die as a man and never experienced that which all men experience?

He lived 33 years as a virgin?

In a time when the Hebrews believed it was a sin to not "go forth and multiply?"

He was a bachelor Rabbi in the 1st Century AD? Find me a bachelor Rabbi in the world today - please.

Ya gotta make a choice here, Laura. Either he came here to live and die as a man, or he came here as a supernatural being, above the fray, telling us to live as only a supernatural being can. And, just as obviously, as a human being, obviously, can not.

Goddess = malarky? Girl, long before the patriarchy of Catholicism was enshrined as the state religion for the political and tactical advatages of the Emperor Constantine, (hence, "Christianity") the goddess had been the focal point for humanity for the entirety of it's existence prior to 325 AD.

It was only then that women became the scapegoat for the "Fall of Man" and "Original Sin" was laid at the feet of Eve and her decendants by the mysoginist "Apostle of the Gentiles" Paul.

The residuals of that falsehood are still being felt today and it is very, very sad (from this warrior's perspective) when a woman of the 21st century finds heself in a position rejecting the idea that she is a godess.

One of those things that those warriors fight for is the right for human beings ("We hold these truths to be self-evident") to believe as the they see fit, without prejudice from government.

However, in America, to rely, once again, on Mr. Mecken - "We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart."

I love women. I treasure them. I honor them.

As often as I am able.

This is pure moral relativism.

Because one does something virtuous (i.e. sacrifices one's life for country, family, etc.) does not entitle them to a vice. If you subscribe to this belief, at least acknowledge your inconsistency. To say service to God and country is "good" while declaring pornography (not JUST playboy, friends) morally neutral (at best) and individual choice is evasion or equivalence, both. You seem able to take the high ground in your service to others via military, but, unwilling to acknowledge the moral implications or sheer moral status of porn on 1)families, 2)troop morale, 3)moral fortitude, 4)society at large, and 5) the CONTINUED degradation of women.
I urge you to think about longer reaching effects of the assimilation of porn into society, how it never is just a private, personal thing, and how it violates the very basis of freedom you claim to defend. Our freedoms aren't based on licentiousness, rather, anchored in the One who makes all men free to obey His perfect, pleasing and good will. This was, indeed, what the American experiment what all about. You are not your own, sir.

Oh, and, there is a far cry from an attractive singer/actress coming to dance and sing for the troops and pictures of women in sexual positions unclothed for shameless perusal and acquisition.

"Why do you need porn to masturbate? Why punish the children and wives of soldiers by having porn on post?"


..WTF?

So jerking off (whilst thinking about who-knows-what) is fine with you, but if he DARES to look at some nudy mags..

JamesB - heh. As a commander, I did Health and Welfare inspections - same thing as what Patrick describes.

Amy - so, now you're going into married quarters on post, too? Gonna search those for contraband?

If so, don't forget the videos. Might as well take the alcohol and tobacco, too.

And the chocolate.

Congressman Broun is why non-Republicans think we are narrow and prudish. I am spitting mad. Clearly the man has never been in the service or he would understand the significance of the "porn locker"

There are two different discussions going on here. One is about having porn and the other is about privacy.

First "porn" and it's use by military men.

My favorite Naval Consort is currently deployed and I not only *know* about the porn locker, I have *contributed* to the porn locker. When he arrived in the land of sun & fun, he found the porn locker to be in poor condition so I sent Jenna in the same DVD case with "Rescue Dawn" in my next care package. Whatever that man needs to maintain and survive until he comes home to me is fine with me.

The other is privacy.
Once a person is paid their wage, no matter the source, he or she is free to spend it as they see fit. Butt out Congressman Broun. If a guy paid by IBM or Bank of America can buy Playboy, so can a guy in the military.

Harry Flashman - BZ baby!

Hooray for Boston Maggie!

Please feel free to bring this up at the next roundtable!

Did you notice that NOBODY is standing up for Congress?

Not fer nuthin', but if the Esteemed Addictionologist intends to see Playboy yanked from the shelves, I'd suggest he also include the biker / trucker / muscle / tattoo mags, the soap-opera digests, Cosmo, and 95% of the paperbacks AAFES offers for sale.

Oh, and don't forget the pantyhose packages! Never seen such salacious displays of the female ankle in my entire career as a self-certified addictionologist...

Ha! Way to get me in trouble, Patrick. I swore up and down to Jack Holt that if he let me into the Bloggers Roundtables that I knew how to behave. Imagine if that's my debut question/comment! John at The Castle of Argghhh!!! would choke and when he recovered he's say........."See!"

Maggie,

But they are much less likely to hang up on your first time out, and it needs saying.

Sincerely, you carry a great deal of moral weight and speak for a lot of decent, moral, supportive wives who are not joyless prudes. Besides, if they didn't want chutzpah, they shouldn't have invited you!

The Thunder Run has linked to this post in the - Web Reconnaissance for 04/25/2008 A short recon of what’s out there that might draw your attention, updated throughout the day...so check back often.

Simple solution; reinstate the Comfort Corps.

In my most humble personal opinion, women like Amy should be the first to jump at the chance.

I was just wondering why we punish the single guys by letting some guys get married and have kids . . . . when I was in the army the married guys got out of things simply for that reason. They were allowed to live off post and given extra money without having to maintain a space in the barracks.

True story: LtCol is wandering through on one of his "we ain't got nothin' better to do" inspections and stops at my friends area. My friend has one of those fold out desk calendars, you know the triangular sort that prop themselves up, anyway it was a playboy calendar, but the picture was about 2x2 inches. I mean, you had to pull that thing close to your face to see it.

Well the LtCol does see it and when he finally figures out what it is, he asks my friend: "You know that's someone's daughter? Don't you?" My friend answered "I suppose so, never thought about it." And so the LtCol gives him a "think about it" kind of speech.

Right behind the Lt.Col was the Command Sargeant Major. As the LtCol was leaving the CSM leans in toward my friend winks and says: "If that's the daughter, I can't wait to see the mom!"

So, who did we want to follow into battle?

Think this is bad? Wait until Hillary is President. A pussified army awaits.

I suppose if I were as much of a bloodless shrieking harridan as Amy Proctor or her fellow travellers, I might think that the fact soldiers prefer to look at nude photographs of airbrushed beauties than me as "punishment", too.

From Kipling:

We aren't no thin red 'eroes, nor we aren't no blackguards too,
But single men in barricks, most remarkable like you;
An' if sometimes our conduck isn't all your fancy paints,
Why, single men in barricks don't grow into plaster saints.

I was in the Air Force in the early 80s. In the last week of the Security Police Academy the instructors called a meeting. They asked us to bring to the day room all those magazines that would embarass "Mom" that we had accumulated for donation to the instructor's library rather than throwing them away prior to returning home. There was a considerable stack the next day. Can't imagine the size of the instructor's library.

"Because one does something virtuous does not entitle them to a vice."

This would be appropriate if the conversation had to do with some "vice."

But, assuming there are willing adult models who are capable of true consent for the photography, where's the vice? This whole "masturbation demeans what should be an act of love" hoohaw is simple Prohibitionism run wild.

I know of no married man who doesn't frequently masturbate. None. Men seek sexual stimulation and satisfaction far more often than do women. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know this is generalizing.) In the antiquated model of male/female relationships, men could simply take what they wanted from their wives, even if it was several times per day. The model has changed, but biology hasn't; nowadays, we recognize that one can make love to a mate as an act of love while masturbating for only physical pleasure. The one does not detract from the other.

Hey Patrick,

Mary and I are driving up I-95 and laughing htstercally at this thread. (I am typing this on the iPhone so apologies for typos )

Anyway we just want to put a word on for women who think IRS fine for guys to fling their ropes or lope their mules to pix of luscious female flesh. Guys, some girls are on your side!

Re: Sarge's comment:
"Simple solution; reinstate the Comfort Corps.

In my most humble personal opinion, women like Amy should be the first to jump at the chance."

Baby, that's mean! You call it "Comfort Corps" and then you stock it with women who think a little skin is evil? Whiskey Tango Foxtrot! Those guys don't want prudish women......THEY WANT ME!

Patrick - I forwarded your complimentary email to the favorite Naval Consort and he asked how I was fitting my head through a doorway.....lol, then he concurred.

Guess we should just tell the Congressman that we aren't jerking off just for the fun of it, rather we are doing it to "prevent prostate cancer". http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,352278,00.html

Re: "Masturbation addiction," there was an Australian study back in 2003 or 2004 that showed that men who masturbate five or more times per week have a lower rate of prostate cancer later in life. So in this case, porn is like vitamin supplements. It's a health care issue!

I'm not about ot deny my soldiers the right to engage in a little "turret time" if it will help them to take the edge off and stay focused on the mission.

I submit that, if you really wanted to curb this, you should have squashed the whole "free love" movement back in the '60s...

My guys aren't saints, I don't expect them to be. The best I can do, as a sheepdog to the Master, is encourage them to consider mending their ways, but I'm not going to demand it.

I figure that, if a fellow has a deep, loving, and passionate relationship with his significant other, the issue is moot (sorry), and he's one of the lucky ones...

Obviously there are folks here who haven't heard what passes for "civilized conversation" in a barracks or berthing area.

Oh, and Platoon Sergeants conduct "health and comfort inspections" too.

Maggie - Thanks, girl. And, I'm sure they would want you-;)

Yehudit & Mary - Thanks Ladies - glad we entertain you as much as your gender does us.

As long as we're telling war stories (What's the difference between a war story and a fairy tale? A. A fairy tale starts out "Once upon a time" and a war story starts out "This is no shit!"~) I'm reminded of a gag we'd pull on boots and newbies - a lot of barracks and hootch discussions concern sex (Surprise! Surprise! Sgt. Carter - G. Pyle) and one of saltier NCO's would casually ask one of the new guys if he had ever been caught masturbating in the closet. The young Marine would generally go beet red, stutter, stammer and splutter out a "No! Never!"

The NCO would then quip - "Good place then ain't it kid."

And this is, of course, no shit.

BTW - Playboy is porn? Please - Playboy is to porn what Harlequin Romance bodice rippers are to great literature.

This is what the congressman thinks is important? What about lowering our taxes? How about getting the heck out of personal lives!
And Amy Proctor - dear lady, I really do feel sorry for you. Porn can be fun to watch with your spouse, some porn is so silly that you might giggle all night long!

Anyway, Amy, you need a hobby so you can get so involved in discovering your God-given talents that you can stop playing God by judging everyone.

These men are giving everything to make us safe. I think it is very petty and unChristian to take away from them some silly porn.

I'm wearing you down, Patrick!

Harry, sure, PORN CAN BE FUN! I've been married for 20 years. What's your track record?

Mz. Proctor -

I tried marriage but came to realize my Darwinian dominant nature and decided I'd be in charge of my own balls.

I now own a slave girl who eagerly submits to my every brutish, swinish sexual whim and debased proclivity. Branded with a tattoo of my initial she serves in perpetual sexual slavery.

Kinda like a husband but without the great sex and kitchen service.

Seriously, Ms. Proctor - I don't "use" porn anymore. I have a woman that is fulfilling and absolutely loving (despite my Taurean and Marine Corps barbarian tendancies).

You must understand that a guy in combat is a completely different story. From your posts you seem to think that his having an orgasm not in your prescence is some type of betrayal.

Amy, it's not. Regardless of what present conventional wisdom and poitical correctness dictate, men and woman are very different. It's a fact. You can look it up in various and sundry scientific journals.

Before men are men they read comic books and play video games as an outlet for hormonal release and then they discover your fair gender and suddenly, Batman and the Mario Brothers are yesterdays news.

Here is a bulletin for you - women also masturbate! Not in combat or because they're away from their loved one but just because they're a human animal and it fulfills a need and feeds a deeply seated psycological fantasy hunger.

Live and let live, girl. You'll be a helluva lot happier.

FWIW I never met a guy who felt that my having a (self-produced) orgasm not in his presence was any type of betrayal.

Ahh,now it hits me. Judith the Widow, the Hasmonean! Taker of heads and supreme in guile and femine wiles.

Yehudit! How soon one forgets. I grew up in Chicago in a neighborhood so Jewish (Rogers Park) that I was royally pissed when I didn't get a bar mitzvah and those wonderful envelopes. As a Gentile I got confirmation and became a "soldier of Christ and there wasn't any cash filled envelopes accompanying the ceremony.

However, I did spend most of my youth with people that had strange tattoos on their arms, were tough but, loving and posssessed of a wonderful sense of humor. All of which engenderd in me a burning curiosity in history that I've neve lost.

Mariamne, doomed wife of Herod and the last of the Hasmoneans.

Pleasure to know you Judith/Yehudit. L'Chaim and Mazel Tov!

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